Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Randomize
