I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Randomize
