One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
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