so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
You need a sexual gate keeper
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
