Can Purell be used as lube?
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
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