You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
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