shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize