he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
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