did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
