I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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