I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
Randomize
