Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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