Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
