I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize