You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
