if you like me you must not know who I am
Slut skills are useful in every country.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Randomize
