Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Randomize
