Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
