Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Found the puke drawer
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
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