my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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