his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
