you would pick up someone in the library
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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