Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Randomize
