never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Randomize
