I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Randomize
