You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
