the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
