question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
