i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Randomize
