PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
