Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
