people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
How external is "for external use only"?
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Randomize
