Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
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