he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
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