i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
My penis needs a shock collar
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize
