I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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