I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
