at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Pappa wants mamma naked
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
