I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Randomize