a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize