I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
