if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
