Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
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