And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Randomize
