it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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