I can't watch pbs sober anymore
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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