He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
