I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
Randomize
