Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
