just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Randomize
