Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
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